Regrets

Regrets. We all have them. Some are bigger. Some are smaller. Sometimes, in the moment, we know we will have regret. Other times, we will not know there will be regret until it’s too late. Just like Coach Herm Edwards says, “Don’t press send!” That is really a metaphor for life. We all have choices every single day we are fortunate enough to wake up – It is up to us to make the best decision we can in order to have no regrets.

I know I have had numerous regrets throughout my life. Struggling through college for 10.5 years and both my parents having passed away by the time I was 31 years old have basically defined me, thus far. I do not want them to define me anymore. I want to share my experiences and let people who are going through similar situations know they are not alone. Shit is going to happen. I have learned that no matter what, it is just a part of life. It is how we respond to what happens to us that will make the difference.

I am fortunate that I have been very close with my maternal grandparents throughout my life. One of my biggest regrets is not getting through school in time for my grandfather, Jake, to see me become a College Graduate! I know he was there in spirit, but a regret was not  being able to share that moment with him. Earlier in the night that he passed away, he was not able to communicate anymore. I made him a promise that I would graduate college, and then he made a noise. That is a moment I will never forget for the rest of my life.

I have two main regrets pertaining to my dad passing away. I wish I had gotten a photo of us while he was in the hospital for the two months before he died. I got one of just him, but in retrospect, I wish I could see a photo of the two of us together.

For about the last year or so my dad was alive, he really wanted me to start working on my weight and getting healthier. And all I did was get bigger and bigger. How come four months after he died, I started working out and eating healthier? It does not make any sense to me. It is something my mind can’t fucking fathom (alliteration), whatsoever. What I would do now for him to see that I have lost close to 40 pounds…

I want to leave you with this to ponder – What are you doing today to get better, so you will not have any regrets, no matter how big or small you might think they are?!

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